Admissions of Irrelevance

She doesn't check LJ anymore...

Wed, 04 Nov 2009 15:51:58 GMT

But HAPPY BIRTHDAY, AFADOVEN!

I waxed poetic about her here.

I love her a lot.

VINDICATED.

Tue, 13 Oct 2009 02:12:25 GMT

We've pulled up to a drive thru; we're both too tired to cook dinner, we just wanna go home and forget about everything. He's had an anxiety-filled day of work, I've got a headache going on 5 days, and dammit, I want a milkshake.

We make our food order, and Puce leans over to me.

Puce: "What size do you want?"

Me: "Regular."

Puce sighs and puts his hand on my knee. "Okay. You ALWAYS do this. There's no such thing as 'regular' size. They have small, medium, or large. There's NO SUCH THING as Regular size. Medium or small? Which do you want?"

Me: We're sharing, so.. "Medium."

Puce (to the drive-thru guy): "And a medium pumpkin shake."

Drive-Thru Guy: "Actually we don't have a medium size, sir. Our shakes come in Regular or Large."

Me: *dissolves into fit of laughter*

Puce: "...Then we'll take a Regular."

Me (after I stop to breathe): "This is so going in LiveJournal."

Having just finally watched Torchwood: Children of Earth special

Sun, 11 Oct 2009 09:46:10 GMT

Dear BBC:

You're all a bunch of bastards.

Sincerely,

Me.

Awesome Things I Have Lost:

Tue, 06 Oct 2009 22:26:20 GMT

My leather banded Pez watch
The photo album containing all of my childhood pictures
My red plaid Gripfast boots that matched my plaid miniskirt exactly
My two Nightmare Before Christmas sleep shirts that I wore CONSTANTLY at Bayside
My burgundy Tower Records hoodie
My black hoodie with the bleach stain that I loved because Puce gave it to me
My two babydoll teeshirts with punky cats on them

What awesome stuff did YOU lose that you wish you still had?

Awww yeah, baby...

Tue, 22 Sep 2009 21:24:13 GMT

Often in our neighborhood, specifically at the apartment complex down the street, we see a company called Mow-Town taking care of the property. They have groovy vans, and it brings a smile to see them.

And then I found out today what their website is, and the site's even happier.

Legends of Landcare.

Too bad they're only commercial. I would hire them just based on the awesome.

The Alphabet According to Google

Wed, 09 Sep 2009 00:10:49 GMT

A is for Amazon
B is for Best Buy
C is for Craigslist
D is for Dictionary
E is for eBay
F is for Facebook
G is for gmail
H is for Hotmail
I is for IRS
J is for JCPenny
K is for Kohl's
L is for Lowe's
M is for MySpace
N is for Netflix
O is for Orbitz
P is for Photbucket
Q is for Quotes
R is for Realtor.com
S is for Southwest Airlines
T is for Target
U is for USPS
V is for Verizon Wireless
W is for Wal*Mart
X is for XM Radio
Y is for Yahoo
Z is for Zillow

CLASS C BEVERAGE ALERT

Thu, 20 Aug 2009 05:50:11 GMT

I have a new icon.

Comixed

Wed, 19 Aug 2009 19:58:09 GMT

new site for lolz. this one made me laugh until I cried:

Science Fun!

Fri, 14 Aug 2009 04:45:33 GMT

I'm watching Bill Nye the Science Guy whilst doing my finances. It's currently the one about meteors and comets, which sparks a conversation between Puce and I over what the various planets are made of (I need to brush up on my astronomy).

I google "What is Venus made of" and come across this.

I shouldn't have found this nearly as funny as I did.

SERIOUSLY.

Mon, 27 Jul 2009 20:16:07 GMT

EVERYONE STOP GETTING INTO CAR ACCIDENTS.

THIS IS NOT A HIP NEW TREND.

STOP IT.

I hate this heat jazz.

Sun, 26 Jul 2009 17:40:31 GMT

It's 10 in the morning, and the fan in the attic space has already kicked on because of the heat.

Summer can EFF OFF.

I am a doy head.

Mon, 20 Jul 2009 22:57:25 GMT

So that scone recipe? Isn't Chef Ian's. It's one I typed up from my textbook awhile back. I totally pasted in the WRONG RECIPE.

I mean, it's still a really good recipe. But it isn't Chef Ian's.

I posted his, here, back in May of 2006. THIS is the recipe I use anymore. THIS is the certified kickass Certified British scone recipe.

THIS is the best one. Sorry about that.

The Best Scones Ever, Seriously.

Mon, 20 Jul 2009 04:50:36 GMT

I think I posted this recipe before, but my darling Heartspunmom asked for a tasty scone recipe, and this is the best one. It was given to me by my bona-fide Englishman pastry instructor, so he should bloody well know scones.

Here is the entry about that.

Here is another one!

This is a very versatile 'rubbing method' recipe. Most people think of nasty, dried biscuits when they think scones, but a proper one is very moist and chewy. Just ask any Brit. Weight approximations are given in kitchen measurements also, but I recommend going by weight for the best accuracy, cause my math may suck.

6 oz bread flour* (1.9 cups)
6 oz pastry flour* (1.9 cups)
1.5 oz sugar (about 1/4 cup)
1/4 tsp salt
.75 oz baking powder (1 3/4 tbsp)
4 oz (1 stick) COLD butter
2.5 oz eggs (almost a half-cup, or a little over one egg - an egg and one yolk)
6.5 oz COLD milk (a little more than 3/4 cup)
3 oz of 'floater' ingredients**

*All-Purpose flour may be substituted for the pastry and bread flour, the result will just be a little denser.

**You can add whatever on earth you want to this mix. This is whatever you like - currants, cheese, chocolate, blueberries, dried apricots, whatever. Go wild! A little more than 3 oz won't hurt, but don't go overboard. You need some scone to hold the stuff together. ^_^

How to Build It:

1. Add all the dry ingredients together. It's best if you can sift it together.
2. Cut the butter in pieces and literally rub it into the dry mix. Yes, you have to get your hands in this - take handfuls of the mixture and rub it between your thumbs and forefingers to spread the butter evenly into the flour mix. You'll want all of the butter in fine crumbs.
3. Add the eggs. DON'T overmix this. You want it BARELY mixed.
4. Pour in the cold milk. Again, do not overmix. Don't worry about lumps in the batter; it'll work out in the baking. Overmixing is evil.
5. Chill the batter for at least 20 minutes. Two hours is ideal. Yes, this is important.
6. Turn the batter onto a floured work surface. The colder the batter, the easier it is to work with. See? I told you it's important. Roll the batter out into a rectangle no thinner than a quarter inch thick.
7. Place all of your 'floater' ingredients in the center third of the rolled out batter, and then fold the sides over them. You may pat it closed if you want, but it's important that you don't roll it out too thin. 3/4 of an inch to even an inch and a half is ideal for a scone.
8. Cut the dough into triangles, and place on a cookie sheet. Parchment paper is best for this, but you can spritz the sheet with no-stick cooking spray if you don't have paper.
9. Brush the scones with a little egg wash - basically, beat one egg, add a tablespoon of water. You may use a corner of a paper towel for the brushing if you don't have a brush. God knows before I took this class *I* didn't. You want the egg on THINLY, and don't let it drip down the sides, or it'll seal the scone and prevent it from rising well.
10. If you feel specially domestic, you can top the scone with something complimentary to the filling - crystal sugar, if it's sweet filling, poppyseeds if it's savory, etc. Avoid cheese or anything that'll melt.
11. Cook on 375 for about 25 minutes. You should be able to tell when they're done, the scone will puff up and spring back when touched.

92 degrees. IN MY ROOM.

Sat, 18 Jul 2009 02:27:28 GMT

Who authorized this?!

This is news?

Tue, 14 Jul 2009 03:24:32 GMT

Cats exploit their owners by purring.

Seriously. This is news?

Somewhere outside my window...

Tue, 30 Jun 2009 04:40:55 GMT

..A child of maybe ten is walking along the breezeway behind my house, absolutely belting out "Cum On Feel The Noize".

As you were.

Tue, 23 Jun 2009 17:30:44 GMT

I saw this ad on my Facebook. Wow. Just...wow. I don't have words.

Just condolences for anyone who actually clicks through that ad and purchases resumé services.

If you miss ZeFrank's "the Show"

Tue, 23 Jun 2009 00:18:38 GMT

Well, did you know that he did a little "That Makes Me Think Of" segment for Time Magazine?

He totally did.

It's like The Show got to breathe again for 2 minutes and 20 seconds.

IN the meantime, there's Uncle Jay Explains The News.

You might want to pick this one first: Uncle Jay Explains how Congress works (or doesn't). It's made of win.

Dave McKean is amazing.

Tue, 16 Jun 2009 18:27:26 GMT

Dave McKean - you know, the guy who did all of the most amazing Sandman comic covers, directed MirrorMask, illustrates all kinds of other Neil Gaiman work? - has been commissioned by the Royal Mail to create a series of stamps depicting mythical creatures.

You can buy them starting today. The presentation pack includes short bits written by Neil Gaiman. They're gorgeous and the presentation pack is about $7 US.

Worth it. I've bought mine already.

Recipe for best day ever:

Sun, 14 Jun 2009 05:54:16 GMT

1. Got to sleep as late as I wanted to
2. Played Plants vs. Zombies while eating cherries for breakfast.
3. Shower with new delicious smelling soap from Villainess.
4. Randomly introduced to the drummer from Steppenwolf while buying ear plugs at Guitar Center. True story. Very nice guy.
5. Seeing Afadoven after a too too long period of absence.
6. Good dinner at a very chic little Thai bistro.
7. PORTLAND TAIKO. AWESOME.
8. Creme brulee at the Heathman.
9. Closing out the evening by watching my husband play Shadow of the Colossus.

FANTASTIC EVENING A++ WOULD LIVE THROUGH AGAIN

ROFL

Fri, 12 Jun 2009 21:34:17 GMT

Also?

Fri, 12 Jun 2009 06:48:01 GMT

Yoinked from a friend on Facebook. This is made of WIN AND MUSIC:

Axis of Awesome are an Australian comedy group. In this clip, they demonstrate that all you need for pop music success is four chords.

You won't stop believin'.

This blog made me want to kill myself.

Fri, 12 Jun 2009 04:07:24 GMT

Alice and Kev, a social experiment.

This is an experiment in playing a homeless family in The Sims 3. I created two Sims, moved them in to a place made to look like an abandoned park, removed all of their remaining money, and then attempted to help them survive without taking any job promotions or easy cash routes. It’s based on the old ‘poverty challenge’ idea from The Sims 2, but it turned out to be a lot more interesting with The Sims 3’s living neighborhood features.

This blog nearly made me cry. Twice.

ROFL

Wed, 10 Jun 2009 01:28:42 GMT

I just got a spam email with the subject line:

"LOOK AT THIS GLORIOUS SHIT"

I lol'd a little.

By the way?

Thu, 04 Jun 2009 23:59:02 GMT

It's dreamwalker13's birthday today. Go say hi. She's awesome.